zeldathemes
you can't stop these kids from dancin
" it's not death that scares us
it's the ghosts we cannot see "
-- driver friendly

hey i'm hailey! thanks for visiting. i am fifteen, play trombone, and like various things, including vagueness.

genderfluidmermaid:

fisto:

i really like the idea of a fantasy setting but in modern times. elves on smart phones and taking pictures for their instagram. dwarves getting into console wars and calling each other casual gamers. mages casting dangerous spells for the vine. i want it.

"Dude I dunno, necromancy is pretty fucked up." "Do it for the vine."

teacher: i’m gonna-
me: mAke iT bENd AnD bREaK, saY A pRAyEr And leT tHE goOD TiMEs roLL [SLOWLY RISE OUT OF SEAT], in cASe God DOesn’t shOW [JUMPS ONTO CHAIR] aND i WaNt thESe WORds tO mAke tHiNGs RIght BUt iT’s tHe WroNGs That mAke thE wORds cOme To LiFe [THROWS DESK ACROSS THE ROOM] “WHO DOES HE THINK HE IS?” If tHaT’s thE WOrst yoU Got bETter pUt YOur FinGErs BAck tO thE kEYs [DROP KICKS TEACHER] oNe niGHt anD oNe MorE tImE [BUSTS DOWN DOOR TO ANOTHER CLASS] tHAnkS fOr thE mEMoriEs evEN tHOugH tHEy WERen’t sO GReat [UPPERCUTS A PLAY DOUGH CAN] “He TaSTes liKE yOu oNLy sWEetEr.”
whoredinarygirl:

clamjob:

what the fuck is this

disappointment

whoredinarygirl:

clamjob:

what the fuck is this

disappointment

In the delivery room

tokomon:

mother: is it a boy or a girl?

doctor: *puts baby between teeth* it’s a metaphor

mallardfillmore:

I almost just ruined my life

mallardfillmore:

I almost just ruined my life

thetumblr-thisisatumblr:

making plans with friends like

image

metamerismmuse:

catsbeaversandducks:

Meerkats make the best photographer’s assistants EVER.

Via BuzzFeed

Meerkats 5ever

my future child: tell me a bedtime story
me: once upon a time, in nazi-occupied france...
default album art
Played: 363,769 times.

juilan:

A Paula Deen Thanksgiving show was on and I swear it sounded like a weird porno.

"Wanna taste my pie? Gurl, I wanna taste yo’ pie."

leviisacutelittleshit:

colourfulpantsandarainbowhat:

beggars-opera:

colourfulpantsandarainbowhat:

WHY DO PEOPLE CALL IT FUCK, MARRY, KILL WHEN THEY COULD CALL IT BED, WED, BEHEAD

easy there henry

whos henry what thef uck?

*faint laughter from Britian*

This show is my life

braiker:

Are you fucking kidding me? Did we all just wake up in 1938?

braiker:

Are you fucking kidding me? Did we all just wake up in 1938?